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Thursday 6th September 2018


My daughter continues to rock as a comedian.  Catie was trying to teach her about science today and said “Phoebe, can you say ‘gravity’?”‬
‪Phoebe replied “I can say lots of words Mummy. I can say poo poo and wee wee and those are very funny words.”‬
Both amusing and a brilliant way to get away with the fact that she can’t say gravity.
We’ve been trying to teach her about DNA too and later she was asked, “What are you made of?” And she said “DNA and poo poo and wee wee.” It was the repetition that made it amusing. But also, it’s funny because it’s true.
She has also started asking where things come from, including her and her brother. So far she is satisfied with the response that we made her and Ernie and that her grandparents made me and Catie and hasn’t asked where the grandparents sprung from. More interestingly she has asked me this week, who built the swimming pool at the hotel and who made the glass in the windows. I haven’t had very good answers for her, but have done my best. 
And knowing that carrots make you see in the dark (like the Nazis she has been fooled by the rumours put about by the RAF in World War II that their pilots had great vision due to high carrot consumption, rather than the radar they were actually using - I wonder if the Nazis started chomping on carrots too and wondered why they weren’t getting the desired effects), every time she eats something she now asks what that particular food stuff does. I have told her that French beans will make her run faster (crazy - everyone knows that’s runner beans), but she says she can already run fast so isn’t bothered and that cauliflower makes you hear better (I didn’t make the connection to cauliflower ear but maybe it was there subconsciously). To prove it I ate some cauliflower and then claimed to be able to hear a cat meowing on the beach. It didn’t convince her to eat cauliflower though and who can blame her? 
I love the idea of each food having the power to do its own thing to a specific body part - it’s not entirely fictional I suppose, but it’d be nice if it was that simple. 
It’s fun playing around with this inquisitive and malleable mind. And as long as the lies you tell are for good then it’s OK surely. Well tell that to the parents who came up with the Ten Commandments in the hope of keeping their kids in line. 
It’s frightening how much of Trump I see in her though. She was being told off by her mum at breakfast and used deflection worthy of the US President and said “Naughty daddy”. Which is one step above “But what about the emails?”
Still she could be the next President.

And another great guest confirmed for RHLSTP. On October 1st I will be talking to Amanda Abbington from off of Man Stoke Woman and Dinopaws (she might have been in Sherlock too). And the other guest for that night is 90% confirmed and is a really good one too. So worth booking sooner rather than later. 
The Manchester RHLSTP is also selling fast (no guest sorted out as yet, but will be getting on that next week). Book now. 

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