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Thursday again? No, it’s always Thursday. It comes round every other day at best. What happened to the other days. Also there have been at least 30 Thursdays in lockdown. Not days that feel like Thursdays. Actual Thursdays. Wake up Sheeple your calendars are lying to you.
Luckily I have invented some anti-Thursday socks. If you wear a pair every day then I can reduce the number of Thursdays per week to just one (hopefully eventually I will invent some that will reduce Thursdays to zero). They only cost £4235 a pair. You can only use each pair once. But if you sign up now you can get free postage and seven pairs for the price of 6.98 pairs.
Lockdown seems to be easing soon. I suppose there comes a time where you have to get the virus and find out if you’re one of the people who gets the bad version. We can’t stay indoors for the rest of our lives. Good luck out there At least we have a government that cares more about us than themselves so should be fine.
People say my son looks like me (they generally agree that my daughter looks like my wife), but I don’t really see it. His hands are about the same size, but apart from that he looks like a baby and I look like a man. But today I saw a photo of my son from the 1960s. He was eating an ice cream and looking at the camera with his trademark cold stare. But wait, my son wasn’t alive 50 years ago. You don’t know what my son looks like, but it’s basically exactly this. When I showed him the photo he also identified it as himself. So maybe there’s a passing resemblance. I've even got his lockdown haircut.
Good to know I have a clone and am being given a second chance at my life. Screwed it up with my first life, so hopefully the second one does better.
Here’s a fun video where an American man who have (unsurprisingly) never heard of me commentates on my heckler video.
