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Thursday 12th January 2017

5162/18082

Only six months of my 40s left. How the fuck did that happen? I am going to grasp these days with both hands and make the most of every single second.

Except that today when writing a joke about Civilisation II for AIOTM I idly wondered if I could work out how to download a copy from the internet and ended up playing that until my eyes went squiffy. I had forgotten about the addictive nature of “Just one more turn” - in fact I just lost another 30 minutes to it between these two sentences and have now deleted the game (Can I sue Sid Meier for the months of my life that he has stolen from me?). Ah the weekends I wasted when I lived alone and was too shy to ask my friends if they were up to anything when I lived in Clapham South. I would play it until 5am and then have a couple of hours sleep and be right back on it. I never got on with the subsequent versions though. Civ II is both simple and complex enough, but I wish the other nations would just get on with me peacefully so I can just build up trade. But they are only human and thus war and destruction is the only way.

Luckily I had managed to get most of the video script written for the show, though for some reason this one is proving incredibly difficult. I have certainly worked harder on it than any of the other episodes, but have much less to show for it. I am sure I will pull it together in time (and I think there’s some funny stuff in there), but I have not felt very inspired. Maybe six shows was a big ask. Perhaps I should have put all that money into one amazing episode. Nah… this is much more fun. But on a week when I am tired and have the pressure of loads of “proper” work to do, it is certainly an additional stress. Also, as we’ve settled into things and cut down on props and binned the idea of doing sketches with puppets, the crew don’t need the script way in advance. And if my brain knows I have more time to do the work, it will use all the time available. We’re back to old school AIOTM where it feels impossible and seat of the pants. And maybe that’s a good thing.

I’d have liked it if we could have done more filmed sketches, but the budget isn’t going to quite stretch to that. Hopefully there will be at least two an episode though. And there’s some fun cartoon stuff in the pipeline too.

I continually remind myself through the gloom of poor inspiration, how lucky I am to be in the position I am. I can’t quite believe it really. I am so rubbish and lazy. I’m not even any good at Civilisation II.

It shows that with persistence, determination and mild obsession you can get a long way. I really owe my career to the man I was 30 years ago. He didn’t care about anything else other than comedy, so didn’t mind if he had no money or friends or girlfriends (I think he minded about that, but there wasn’t much he could do about it, as he was a clueless dick). And if you’re prepared to give up on everything else to follow your obsession, then you have a chance of making it. 

And then the man I was 17 years ago sealed the deal for me by being prepared to do six years work in two years when writing Time Gentlemen Please. Although the job broke me in many ways (and I wonder if it gave me this love/hate relationship with deadlines - when I discovered I could write a sitcom script in a week if the pressure was intense enough, it made it hard to not always work that way) it gave me some financial security. I remember thinking at the time as I worked myself into the ground that this would all be the benefit of my future family. I was working for people that I didn’t know and who in at least one case didn’t exist. But it turned out, luckily, to be correct. I sacrificed a lot of my 20s and early 30s for this job and to get to where I am. Imagine how much the properly successful people must have given up.

Some of it was fun too, I think. I can’t really remember. But as so often I’d have to thank that confused, lost and comedy obsessive idiot for doing all the work, whilst I can coast along doing nothing (cough).

Suffice to say that the New Year’s Resolution to do more reading and spend less time playing video games and watching TV is not working out. Though I still haven’t eaten any chocolate since Christmas Day and have cut right back on drinking (I’m on about two drinks a week, which is a nice compromise if I can keep it up and less harsh and show-offy than stopping entirely). Not lost much weight yet, but feeling a lot better.



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