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Tonight I got to see one of the shorts we filmed last year on the big(gish) screen. We went to Rachel Stubbins’ “Shooting the Breeze” at the Shortwave cinema in Bermondsey to see (amongst other things) “While You Were Away”. It was great to have a night out with my wife and we had a Thai meal and drank a bit too much on the way there (and our punishment was to be sat in the front row of the event dying for a wee for the last half an hour, but unable to leave for fear of seeming rude). But the selection of short films and meeting a few of the people who have made them was very inspiring. In a world where TV is becoming a closed shop, more interested in reality shows, panel shows and resurrecting old sitcoms than discovering new talent, it’s amazing to see people getting off their arses and making interesting and professionally produced stuff off their own bat. All the films we saw tonight were original and many of them quirky and a few downright strange (not least the one that I was in) and I am delighted to have seemingly accidentally stumbled into this world.
Usually I find watching myself act a bit too cringy to really enjoy, but I felt at the time that we’d made something good and I hadn’t let anyone down and I was quite impressed by my performance, although I was helped by the fact that I had only had two hours sleep the night before we filmed it, so I look suitably fucked (even without the make-up). Given it’s a hyper-real situation I thought that both Rachel and I gave truthful performances and weirdly the only bit that annoyed me was where near the start (you’ll get to see this soon) I indicate to her to sit down. Which felt like a bit of acting and not something that a husband would do, even in the strange situation he had found himself in (I can’t say too much without ruining it for you). But I am my own worst critic (and my self-criticism is mediocre at best) so to have one little annoyance (that I don’t think anyone else would pick up on) is totally remarkable.
Gratifyingly and insultingly everyone who spoke to me afterwards seemed surprised that I could act. But maybe that’s my own fault, as I have spent most of my career resolutely pretending to be useless at it (cf my Scotch accent) and claiming that I don’t want to do it. My wife was laughing at me afterwards because when a successful independent film director was asking me if I was interested in doing more acting, I more or less said that I wasn’t because it usually took up so much time. I don’t know why I said that because I am interested in doing more acting, but it’s some kind of self-defence mechanism or misplaced modesty or something. I wouldn’t like to be just an actor, but I’d love to do more than I am currently doing. When I started out I was probably more interested in acting than being a stand-up and at University had had some success at it on a student level. But my confidence was smashed on various projects and I seemed to get pigeon-holed as a writer who could maybe do some broader sketch characters (though my co-stars in the dum show made me feel that I wasn’t even really up to that) and nobody really ever asked me to be in anything else (and perhaps my problem is that I wait to be asked - there’s so much competition for acting roles that I think many of them go to the ruthlessly ambitious and super-confident). So I’ve mainly only acted in things that I have written myself. And even then I have often been dissuaded from taking part.
So I am glad that I seem to have acquitted myself well in the two shorts that I did last year (though I genuinely place a lot of the credit for that with the other actors I worked with and the director Ben Mallaby who managed to curb my more gurning comedic inclinations) and it would be cool if it led to some other stuff. Though I am more than happy for that to be smaller and independent productions, mainly because I am more interested in being in things that are good and creative rather than mainstream and a bit rubbish (having said that I did seriously consider being the voice of flavour in a crisp advert last week).
But chatting with people like Superbob and Corner Boys director, Jon Drever afterwards did make me think that finding the way to produce my own stuff online is probably going to be more satisfying (even if occasionally I might have to compromise and play some crisp flavour in order to fund it) and I hope I can bring some of this ethos to As It Occurs To Me later in the year (if we can kickstart it). It’s totally crazy that TV executives aren’t flocking to a night like this to see the kind of stuff they could be doing if they worked with current talent, rather than raking the graves of the 1970s (which in all other aspects the BBC seem to be desperate to distance themselves from). But it seems the people working of the BBC are doing all they can to help position the sword in exactly the right place so it will cause optimal damage when they finally throw themselves on to it.
Check out brilliant Corner Boys here
You can rent Superbob for 99p here and in other places and see what is possible with drive and determination
This is Lesley, the film that opened the evening with stand up Arnab Chanda doing a great acting job (about someone trying to get some acting jobs).
This is the trailer for One Tw*t which I enjoyed most of all. More weird darkness.
We also saw Smoga, which is skilfully authentic.
And there was a super weird animation that I can’t even begin to describe and don’t know how to google which went on for much too long and would blow your mind if you were on drugs (and probably if you weren’t as well) which I didn’t really like that much, but which was truly unique and which I’d much rather see than a remake of Are You Being Served. In fact I think the BBC should be forced to put it on for half an hour at prime time. I will remember it until the day I die and that is as impressive as if I had enjoyed it.
