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Wednesday 27th March 2024

Woke up annoyingly early (as usual) - why can't I get a much needed lie-in. No one was even going to kick me out of the room this time.
I didn't have a chance to do too much sightseeing of course (and I did none) because I had to work on the show. Will the stand up tour be any different? If I don't have to work in the day will I be up climbing mountains and visiting museums? You know the answer already. Maybe I can catch up on sleep, but it's not likely. I'll have time for that when I am dead.
It was good to be back at Oran Mor and I enjoyed looking back at the blog from one of my previous visits where I was picketed by baptists. I found out today that the reason I was shepherded away from my confrontation was not because the venue staff were concerned for my safety, but because a wedding was taking place upstairs in the venue/church and they were coming out for photos. Though the protestors would have been there regardless.
What I am more impressed with is that the 42 year old Richard Herring not only did a tour show that night, but went out and did two further gigs afterwards. I absolutely wouldn't have the stamina for even one more performance tonight. Age shall wither me and the years condemn.
Last time I was in Glasgow I played the Kings Theatre to over 1100 people (though to be fair most of them were there to see Limmy or Fern Brady) - the Oran Mor is rather more modest at 270, but I had sold it out weeks ago. It was a bit of a shame not to be in a slightly bigger venue, given the hassle and expense of getting here, but the 270 were champions and we had two brilliant and thankfully loquacious guests tonight - Susie McCabe and Fred MacAulay.
Susie is Glasgow in human form and a remarkable comedian who is enjoying massive success in Scotland especially. She can sell out the Kings Theatre twice in a day with no problem or Limmy. Fred was full of funny stories about the old days and the new days.
Once back at the hotel and hoping to get to sleep quick my phone informed me that my house keys were no longer with me. I assumed I'd left them in the car, but the map on the Find My app showed them on the street outside. I was in bed by now, but I finally decided to put on my clothes and check, just in case they'd fallen out of my pocket. It was about midnight by now and the streets were mainly empty and i walked up and down a street that I hadn't even walked down cos that's where my phone said I was. I was staggering around, looking at my phone, stopping, starting, crossing the road and must have looked crazy. The one lady out there gave me a wide berth. I couldn't find them so went back to the room assuming the phone was wrong and they were somewhere I hadn't looked in the room or in the car. I checked the room again and nothing and went back to bed. But what if I'd dropped the keys by the car? I knew it would stop me sleeping so I got dressed again and went to look.
The map showed the keys about 50 metres from the car, but in a place I hadn't been. Even when I was at the car the app didn't give me any joy and couldn't locate the keys, but they weren't under the car. I checked the pocket in between the seats and there they were. I must have put them there for safety. Still only about 25 minutes of precious sleep time wasted on nothing. Thanks technology.

Another absolutely fabulously extraordinary RHLSTP, this time with someone I have a complicated history with, the divine Julia Sawalha. Unmissable, just to find out what her nickname for me is and to speculate on the identity of the other boyfriends might be.

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