4687/17346
Our search for the house I am going to die in continues. That is very negative. I might not die in there if my wife divorces me (as she should) and gets everything off me (as she deserves - please don’t use this against me future divorce lawyers, I was just being cute). We tried a different place today, a small town that I had never heard of before last week. It’s a bit prettier than Shepherd’s Bush, with less people shitting in front gardens (I am guessing), but has a modest town centre with a nice selection of largely independent shops. We popped into the pub for a coffee and asked if they had any croissants. They didn’t, but indicated a toaster and some bread and condiments on the counter and told us that toast was free. I literally couldn’t believe that this wasn’t some kind of a trick, but we’d stepped outside the M25 and the people here are clearly more generous. And free toast on a daily basis is enough to convince me that this is the place we should live.
I mean it might all be a scam. The estate agent had recommended the pub and had probably sized me up and realised that I was the kind of man who would be impressed by free carbohydrates and maybe he’d rung ahead and told them to put the free toast stuff out, because the prices of a couple of pieces of bread, some butter and marmalade would be more than covered by the cost of the house and all the subsequent business that this clear fan of food and booze would bring to the village. But it worked. And I still think I am up on the deal.
So I am going to do my best to live in this place thanks to the free toast, just like I bought the house I am in now because it had a video doorbell (you could see who was at the door without having to go to the door- you could actually see them). My instincts have never let me down.
I am enjoying house hunting so far, even though it’s been going on, on and off, for a while now. But now it’s a day out in the country with my family, trying to make a decision that will totally change our destinies, if we had any, but certainly one that makes crucial differences for my daughter. Where we live will determine who she is friends with, where she goes to school, her first memories and her future relationships and possibly career. But as we don’t, alas, live in the world of Sliding Doors, we don’t get to see the path that she doesn’t take (or really the infinite paths - she has infinity potential destinies just based on the one place that we do choose).
And it’s a big step in our lives too. It’s close enough to the city to not be leaving all of our current life behind, but this place with the free toast, is very different than Shepherd’s Bush where if anyone sees you with a piece of toast they will stab you in the face for it, and still expect to be paid. But I think I am ready for a quieter pace and the fresher air of the M25 corridor and maybe today we’ve seen the place where my daughter’s memories will be formed, or maybe like the Littlest Hobo we will keep moving on, looking for a home, with the added benefit of still actually having a home to return to. Which is fine, as long as we keep our toast hidden.
Didcot Cornerstone has been added to the Happy Now? tour. All confirmed dates are here.
