As usual I am not getting to see any other shows as yet, but there isn't really any time to. Today I went to the gym, did my podcast, uploaded my podcast, wrote next week's Metro article, did Talking Cock and then headed over to the Pleasance to appear on the "Do The Right Thing" podcast. I didn't even have time to watch Challenge TV, so I am hardly going to go and see a stupid Fringe show. But at least today I felt energetic and healthy. The Edinburgh Fringe has shifted for me from a drunken month of debauchery to a sort of bizarre health spa.
But the best performances happen in real life anyway. As I walked up to the Stand from the gym there was a smartly dressed old fella walking towards me. He was properly old, even accounting for the fact that he was Scottish, he had to be in his 80s at least. But he was sprightly. In fact I saw him break into a trot. You don't often see a man this old running, but he was doing his best and his best wasn't bad. It resembled the slow motion bit from Chariots of Fire. His old man jowls were rocking as he jogged. It was quite a sight to behold. It became clear that he had broken into this mini run as the bus he wanted to be on was at the bus stop behind me. It was only a few metres up the road, at his current trajectory the man was maybe 25 seconds from making it. But I heard the bus doors shutting and saw the old man waving and shouting vainly at the bus driver to wait. I know bus drivers are mean, but surely if he'd seen this remarkable run (more impressive than anything you'd see at the Olympics) he would have been happy to wait for those few seconds to allow this spunky auld fella access to his bus. But the bus just drove on. And it wasn't like the bus driver hadn't seen all this. In fact as he went by - only a few feet from the stop- he looked directly at the crest-fallen man, with a look of total indifference on his face. It would have been easy for him to pull over for ten seconds to let the octogenarian athlete get on, but impassively he drove on. The old man took the slight with disappointment but without surprise. As the bus drove away I saw that it boasted that every bus in the Lothian bus fleet has access for the disabled, elderly and pushchairs. That's all very well, but it's not much use if the drivers don't have the courtesy to give those people the chance to get on. Even if they're doing their utmost to get there in time.
This is human drama that beats anything you'll see in a theatre. Just the old man running was a spectacle worthy of a ten pound entrance fee. But as he dashed, his hopes were also dashed, by a man whose senses were so dulled by his job that he had lost all humanity and respect. There was nothing behind that bus driver's eyes as he looked at the old man, there was more meaning in this weary glance than I could manage in pages of dialogue. The old man was proud and refusing to let his infirmity drag him down and he remained proud, if a little bowed, allowing only a slight amount of exasperation at the perhaps inevitable slight. He must have known as he started the run that the bus driver was probably the kind of cunt who would drive off without him and yet even a lifetime of experience didn't make him give up hope that a flicker of compassion might ignite in what was once the driver's heart.
It was all there. I award the old man and the driver a Richard Herring Fringe First. I hope they will both show up together to collect it, because the drama would not have worked without them both. Though there's only one trophy and they will have to decide between themselves who gets to keep it. And thus their follow up performance will begin.
I was a bit in awe of the brilliant Nina Conti in today's podcast, fascinated as I am by the duality in performance and the characters we create that reveal the hidden aspects in our psyche. She was charming, if a little nervous about being herself, but I hope you'll find it a fascinating chat - all the details of the podcasts past and future can be found
here.
We talked a fair amount about the Me1 vs Me2 podcast, which has a lot of parallels with Nina's work in a weird way. And coincidentally I had just had a shipment of the new "What is Love, Anyway?" DVDs arrive. One of the extras is the filmed Me1 vs Me2 tournament. I don't usually listen back to the podcasts, but I watched this tonight. Chris Evans, not that one, or that one has done an amazing job of putting it together. The show is pretty good, but I think the snooker might be the funniest thing ever committed to video in the history of cinematography. Purists will not like the fact that you can see the action, but weirdly mostly as my head if down you can't really tell I am commentating as I play (or at least you can occasionally forget). It's a frame full of controversy and excitement and I am beginning to wish I had made it a Me1 vs Me2 DVD with What is Love, Anyway? as the free extra.
There's lots of other stuff on the DVD including an interview in which I say "you know" about a thousand times (as well as some other things). It's be lovely if you bought it - it's
exclusively available from gofasterstripe. Do have a shop around while you're on the site as there's loads of brilliant stuff on there. This tiny company is doing an amazing thing, bringing out DVDs of great comedians who would never get a deal anywhere else, many of which lose money. It's so great to see a business that cares more about quality than making cash. But if they make some cash then they can make even more DVDs so do lend a hand if you can. You will be a double winner because you get to see the DVDs too. And the way that Fringe sales are going I might need my DVD to make a bit of cash. So as always if you appreciate the free stuff, I will appreciate it if you occasionally dip into some of the stuff you have to pay for too.
But if it all goes tits up I might just start making some pay to view snooker frames. I could make literally tens of pounds a day.
