Another Sunday and another one-off gig in the north of England. Once again I had elected not to stay over in town, but just get straight into the car and come home. It makes good sense as it saves on a hotel room but also means that the roads are clear so I don't waste five hours tomorrow getting back. The slight downside is tiredness kicking in and the danger of dying, but that's not so much of a problem when you're only doing this one or two times a week.
But I quite like these late night drives (though the fact I know that I will have a tour manager for the 2013 gigs makes them more of an enjoyable novelty). Back in 2005 I was doing drives like this four times a week and so I suppose it's giving me a little flashback to those heady days of getting back into stand up. It's quite rock and roll to be speeding (at exactly 70mph at all times officer) down the motorway in the dark - well it would be rock and roll if I wasn't listening to Desert Island Discs. But that's a brilliant show whcih gives you a good idea of whether a celebrity is a good egg or a prick. Danny Baker certainly came out high on the positive end of the spectrum. He is his own man and justifiably proud of himself, but both those things make him quite exceptional. Martin Clunes was a little more lovey and harmless, but charming and honest. Bombing up and down the country in my increasingly knackered little car makes me feel like a proper stand-up.
There's something almost magical about arriving back in London after having stepped off stage in Sheffield just three hours before. It makes it feel like the day was some kind of dream. If it was it was a fun one. Sheffield has been one of my tour highlights for a few years. I usually get around 300 people coming to see me and the Memorial Hall is a good room to be in and the staff are friendly and efficient.
I'd been asked what hot food I would like on the night via email. That seemed a bit vague, usually they narrow down the choice - would they really be able to get me anything I wanted: Lobster? A suckling pig? I said a pizza would do, but was then asked what I wanted on it. It was quite hard to make such a choice a few days in advance. I didn't really care. But I had been pressed so I asked for parma ham without too much cheese. I thought I might as well test them a little bit and I'd let them off with the lobster. On arrival I was told my pizza was in the dressing room and that they'd had a tough time finding me a parma ham pizza in Sheffield (I had said that I didn't care), but the promoter had gone to the trouble of spreading some parma ham over a regular pizza. I had fun laughing in his face about the quest I had put him through. But appreciated that they go that extra mile for their acts. Some places won't even give you a bottle of water - or even a jug of tap water.
I am still trying to work out where to put the interval break. Though I got a bit of a better feel for it today. It's a touch too early, but I think I should break after the high of "Where have you put your penis for fun?" I maybe need to add five more minutes to the first half if I do that. You don't really want the second half to be longer than the first. I am looking forward to tinkering with the show and adding some extra bits. It's been working really well again on these first three tour dates. Let's not look to see how many there are left to go!
But I was playful with the script and the performance, no longer restricted by the strict time slots of the Fringe. I'd worried that this show might not have as many performance challenges for me, but I think there's plenty of meat in there and am delighted that even now every gig I do is an opportunity to learn and get better at what I do. Those tens of thousands of miles of driving around are slowly and surely paying off. Though I fear that the slight downer I was on throughout September came about because I wasn't getting the buzz of performing. It's mildly tragic and shallow if I need this outlet to feel complete. But I am mildly tragic and shallow. Maybe that's next year's tour title.
Talking Cock comes to London this week on Wednesday, Friday and Saturday in the South Bank
Get tickets here.
And the Leicester Square Theatre line-ups get even better. On the 19th November I will be talking to comedy genius, Adam Buxton. Get your tickets
here
The rest of the line-up is:
October 22nd David Mitchell (sold out, but the venue sometimes adds some last minute standing tickets)
November 5th Dave Gorman
November 19th Adam Buxton
December 3rd Russell Howard
