Food does not save lives. It postpones deaths You end up with the same number of deaths. You just prolong the crisis. Can this country stop being pro-food? Oh wait. I see Brexit’s about to happen. It’s fine. Ignore me.
Amazing to realise I have been clearing stones for over two years now and am only a couple of weeks from the second anniversary of the first podcast about it. But there are many, many more chapters to come, my fine friends. I wish the farmer would harvest their fucking beets though. It's like they are deliberately trying to hamper me.
Just before tonight’s RHLSTP record my daughter emerged from her bedroom to let me know she’d put on every pair of pyjamas she owns. I think she’d stuck on a few extra t shirts as well as she was about 10 layers thick. She was very happy with what she had done and rightly so, it was hilarious. She wanted to keep them all on, but I advised her that she might get a bit hot, so we stripped her down to one layer, laughing as each different article of clothing came off. I love the madness of childhood - as if that wasn’t obvious from my many attempts to extend my own to the end of my life - and the way that kids will just run with an idea. I am unbearably proud of her for being this gleefully stupid.
Unusually I’d had a drink before the podcast, just a couple of small glasses with my wife. I wouldn’t do it usually, but it was only John Kearns tonight, so I thought why not? I had done quite well at stopping drinking, but as we slide unstoppably towards a second lockdown, I slide unstoppably back into the magic bottle that seems to make it all mildly bearable.
Maybe this time I will try to use lockdown to do exercise and get healthy. You know, just in case I get Covid 19 and want to increase my chances of surviving.
Or maybe the prospect of illness and death is not enough incentive for me again.
Whatever gets you through the night.
John Kearns is one of my favourite ever RHLSTP guests and we indulged ourselves in a 90+ minute old school RHLSTP tonight in which was knockabout and rude and then transcended into something more thoughtful. We could have gone on all night I think.
I revealed stuff that I didn’t really expect to - you won’t believe how much I just spent on a pair of pants, or indeed what I experienced with my latest pair of pants.
Or wait a fortnight for the podcast.
RHLSTP with the wise and patient Michael Ian Black creator of Run Fatboy Run is now up on audio
(with bonus podcast about whisky)
Still a couple of hours to bid on the RHLSTP notebook
(only £15 from £1000 now)