Whilst my neighbours drank beer in the sunshine, I stayed inside and kept working away at the 2nd draft of "Whatever The Fuck It's Going To Be Called." The editor came through late with that new title. I thought it was a bit post modern and didn't really explain what the book was about, but he is 150% behind it. It's going OK, but I don't think I will quite finish it tomorrow as I had hoped. Not with Collings and my appearance on 6Music to contend with (10am-1pm digital fans).
But you never know.
I think it's all going quite well.
But consequently very little to report.
I popped down to Nando's for my dinner, to save me having to cook anything, but everyone on Shepherd's Bush seemed to have had the same idea, including four police officers waiting for takeaway. That was a relief as it hopefully meant there would be no repeat of the shooting incident that happened in here a few years ago.
The place was packed. I was taking away too and embarrassed to meet a couple of my pals, who I think noticed that I was wearing my slippers, like a confused old man. Which I suppose is what I am. Except I am lazy rather than confused. I knew what I was doing, but couldn't be bothered to do up laces.
What I like about Nando's in Shepherd's Bush is that on your receipt it proudly gives the name of the restaurant and its phone number, as well as its location. Which according to them is "Shepard Bush." It's not a one off mistake, it's been like that for ages. Apparently the manager of the restaurant doesn't care about the correct spelling, or is trying to institute a new one. I wouldn't mind so much if it was at least "Shepards Bush", but they not only spell it wrong, but it's not even phonetically correct. I know they're Portuguese, but if I was going to open a fish and chip shop in Lisbon I'd at least spell the name of their city the same way they do. But I'm not doing that, so I can call it Lisbon in good conscience. I think they spell it Lisboa, proving they're just about as good at spelling as they are at catching paedophiles.
Someone must have told the manager of the Shepard Bush Nando's how to spell Shepherd's Bush, but still it remains the same. Unless, and this is the only way that I will forgive them, the manager is just coincidentally a man called Shepard Bush and he's arrogant to call his restaurant after himself.
It was nearly enough to put me off my extra hot half a chicken.
But not quite enough.
I hope that once this book is finished I might start eating healthily again.
I watched the final result of Britain's Got Talent, just to see if the country would vote for Susan Boyle and send her on a helter skelter to self-destruction. Or if she would stand on her head and reveal her unkempt ladygarden to the nation, and maybe sing out of her foo foo. She didn't do that, but once she got down to the last three she had a look on her face that suggested she was about to gun down everyone in the room. The thing about BGT is that the crazy people are usually plucked out at the early stages and just used to be laughed at in a 21st Century version of Bedlam. What it doesn't really have any provision for is if a crazy person turns out to be talented too.
I am not saying anyone who got to the final is mentally unstable, but just that it would be possible.
Susan Boyle, perhaps sensing the Hell that might await her (and which to be honest still might do) only stopped looking terrified when she didn't win. She smiled and laughed after four or five minutes of brooding and glaring like a serial killer. And then she started dancing and showing her calves. And then getting more excited looked in danger of revealing what I had thought she would reveal on the podcast. We got to see most of her thighs, and so discovered that she is better pruned than I had possibly imagined.
It was the kind of behaviour you might expect from a mentally unstable elderly relative.
Not that I am saying anyone on the show is mental.
Apart from Piers Morgan obviously.
As I haven't had time to put the programme together there is a slight extension on donations to the
Just giving page. You have til 4th June if you want to get your name in the programme. The current top donation to beat is £300. And including gift aid the fund has already accrued a record breaking amount of almost £6000. So don't miss out. Get your name added to the ranks of wonderful, generous (and only slightly vain) people.
Seriously, you have been amazing.
