Warming Up

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Friday 14th March 2003

I have been using hair gel to keep my girlish flowing locks out of my face whilst IÂ’m on stage. In the shower this morning I was struck by an idea of pure and brilliant genius. When you wash your hair, the gel obviously dissolves and is washed away. Which seems like a waste.
My idea was to invent a hair gel that doubled as shampoo. That is, it had all the properties necessary for holding and styling your hair, but when you stepped under a shower the gel would lather up and you would be able to wash your hair. Why take one bottle into the shower, when you could take none? With the right marketing and an endorsement from Gareth Gates this could be the greatest time saving invention since sliced mushrooms.
I was considering writing to Wella or someone to tell them of this brilliant idea, and already spending the money I would make for such a ground-breaking notion. I told Simon Streeting about it in the car on the way to Oldham. He didnÂ’t seem that impressed, but I knew he was just jealous.
Then he said “Yeah, but what would happen when it rained?”
Dammit, he was right. Your beautifully crafted hair would dissolve into lather and you would be a laughing stock. In one second Simon Streeting had destroyed a whole morningÂ’s worth of work.
Back to the old drawing board.