Someone has suggested that the gel to shampoo transformation could be heat activated, thus normal cold rain would not be a problem. I am beginning to suspect that the manufacture of such a gel would outstrip the cost of just buying shampoo and gel separately, but IÂ’m going to press on. They laughed at the idea of toast once upon a time, and now look at them. Marmite all over their faces.
On the way back from Hereford tonight we stopped behind another car at some temporary traffic lights. The traffic lights changed to green (green is the frog all covered in slime – GO!) but the car in front of us didn’t move. It then indicated left and pulled into the kerb. Naturally Simon Streeting (who was driving) pulled round to the right and overtook the car. But the driver seemed perturbed by this action. He immediately pulled out again and flashed his lights at us, full beam, for several seconds. We tried to work out what we had done to annoy him. Surely his actions suggested we should over-take. Had Simon Streeting inadvertently had his head-lights on full beam at some point along the road and this was a sophisticated and grown-up revenge? Was he just a bored youngster looking to make trouble and incite a needless road rage incident? Was he drunk and acting irrationally? Or was he just trying to shit us up?
The car hung on our tail as we traversed the winding A road, just outside of Gloucester (I suspected that possibly the ghost of Fred West was driving the car looking for fresh victims, but as you may have noticed I can get a little paranoid). Although there was no real danger unless the other driver decided to run us off the road, his bizarre and intimidating behaviour was a little frightening. Even when we started pulling away from him, I could still see his headlights behind us in the left hand wing mirror. One of his headlights was slightly brighter than the other. He was behind us for quite a good long while. It was a bit sinister and suspenseful. It would make a good film. But only if the bloke behind had started attacking us with knives. This didnÂ’t happen.
Luckily we shook him off before Swindon. But if the bloke who was driving the ghost car is reading us could you please e mail me and tell me why you behaved so oddly? Please reveal the make of your car to prove that you are the real twat-face.
There is a prize of 1p for the genuine driver.
