I was doing some publicity stuff for
the forthcoming tour and London run of menage a un this morning. I have to say that I don't really enjoy doing PR. I am not convinced that any of it makes that much difference and it is slightly humiliating to get onto the treadmill of self-promotion. The interviewers and journalists are rarely genuinely interested in you and you are just a way for them to fill up space. Maybe it sells more tickets. Maybe it reminds people you exist. Overall though, outside of Edinburgh, where it maybe makes some difference, it seems to be just a way for the PR people I employ to make some money.
I say all this just to make the point that I was not in the best of moods, feeling slightly resentful that I was up and out of bed and having writing time frittered away (that I could have been frittering away by playing on the internet). I had to keep checking myself, because it wasn't the fault of anyone that I was talking to that I felt like this.
I actually think that 90% of my PR is done on here and via my newsletters. Anyone who is interested in me knows where I am.
First up I was on the XFM breakfast show with the lovely
Lauren Laverne. Time passed. It would have passed in any case.
Then after a phone chat with a bored sounding journalist in Maidenhead, I was down to the Arts Theatre to be interviewed for the Culture Show (a Lauren Laverne theme to the morning - she's the host of that show) on the subject of stage fright and performing in Glasgow.
It was a two person crew and in hindsight there were several clues to the fact that they weren't totally on top of what they were doing. I am not the kind of person who is prepared to tell people how to do their job - sometimes I wish I was - and although a few things struck me as odd I just got on with things.
We had had the Arts Theatre opened up so that we could film here. I had been told that the idea was that this would help illustrate the stage fright element of the piece. So I was a bit surprised when the camera was set up pointing away from the stage to film me in the Circle. But I let it pass.
Then the guy on the camera put my mike on. It seemed to me that he had put it in the wrong place. It was a bit covered by my shirt. "Is this all right?" I asked and he seemed to think that it was. I didn't argue. What do I know?
Then there was another unusual development. Although the guy on the camera was going to ask me the questions, he wanted me to be looking to the left of the lens (as I looked at it) and so asked his colleague to stand in place to give me an eye-line.
This was somewhat bizarre as the question was coming from the right of the camera, but I had to then look at someone who hadn't asked the question and tell her the answer. We were both a bit self-conscious about this. Usually the interviewer sits to one side of the camera and asks the questions and you answer them whilst looking at them. Inevitably I couldn't stop myself looking at the man asking the question and then rapidly looking away to the place I was meant to look to see the other non-questioner looking a bit red and averting their eyes as I told them the answer. This made me spend most of my time looking down to my own left to avoid the embarrassment. I nearly pointed out that this was a dumb way to do things, but didn't want to look like an arse, so went along with it, even though I thought it was almost certainly making me look stupid.
After a few questions the cameraman/interviewer said that there were some problems with the sound and moved my mike to my jacket lapel and made me answer some of the questions again. Not so easy to recreate the spontaneity. Then when I'd told a story a second time he asked me to have another go at the start of it. It was a bit confusing and messy and all in all I couldn't really see how any of this was going to help sell tickets for the tour. I wasn't talking about the tour and surely if anyone was watching they would be put off from coming to see this shifty bloke who didn't seem to know where he was meant to be looking.
It was all finally over with time to spare and I went on to do a more conventional radio interview with someone who seemed to know what they were doing. On the way I talked to a journalist from Hull, telling her stories that were too rude and libellous (I hope) to print. I used to watch myself when I talked to journalists. Now I think fuck it most of the time. We had a laugh. I hope she doesn't stitch me up. Don't think she will. Fuck it though.
When I got home I got an email from my PR guy telling me that the Culture show interview was unusable because the sound hadn't worked properly. They wondered if I could do it all again next week, but I decided to decline. I have too much to do to have to reshoot something due to someone else's incompetence. Most of the things that occupy me are down to my own incompetence. I don't need to bring anyone else into it.
I had had a few emails about the XFM interview, so at least some people heard that one. You never know it might have done some good.
No news from the washing machine man. I took the advice of someone called John who emailed me and am going with
this lot. It was of little surprise to me that the website of the man from yesterday doesn't actually work. The suggested company is a bit more expensive than the other guy, but then I guess he can afford to charge less given that he doesn't turn up and do any of the work.
Thanks to all those of you who have bought the Hercules DVD. We have shifted about 400 units in just one week, which is phenomenal and means we won't lose any money. Which hopefully means more DVDs will be made by those pesky go faster guys. And all without a highly paid PR team. Hmmmmm.
