I am such a lightweight. Those two pints affected the whole of my day. I was tired and a bit grumpy and depressed. My body does not want me to drink and if I am going to get through this demanding tour it seems I can't even have the occasional tipple. It's not worth affecting the show for the sake of tippsiness and if I can't have two pints without repercussions then it's really not worth drinking anything.
I didn't really enjoy tonight's show, though I think the hangover only played a loose part in that. I was back in Wolverhampton, the town I am using for the benchmark of my relative success, as over the last four or five years I have played the same complex on every tour, but have gradually worked my way up through the various sized rooms - from a little room above a pub, to the bar of the main theatre and now in Wulfrun Hall, a potentially 600 seater room, which I am not yet getting close to filling. Then there is the main theatre to aim for, but at this rate it will take me until 2025 to get there. But it's always interesting to see how I do. I think this year I got about the same number of people as I did last year (200 or so). Perhaps I have hit my Wolverhampton ceiling.
But the Wulfrun Hall is a cavernous and echoey room and it's very difficult to see any of the audience or connect with them (and maybe I have been a little spoiled by the intimacy of the Glee clubs where the front row can pretty much reach up and touch you. I wasn't feeling 100% with it and I sense resistance or disappointment from some of the audience (and unusually a couple people on Twitter commented that they didn't like the show, though many others were positive about it). I pushed on and tried to inject the show with more energy, because this is what makes touring tough. It's relentless and you have to keep on giving your all and deliver the material like it's the first time and not let your head drop. In my early tours I think I sometimes just motored towards the end if the audience felt detached from the show, but now I am keen to make the most of every show and try and win people back if I have lost them. Plus I know enough now to be aware that the room and its acoustics can affect a show and that some audiences are just quieter anyway. There is a long, long way to go on this tour and I am going to get tired and irritable and it was slightly annoying that my irritability tonight was partly self-imposed.
The staff at this theatre are terrific and helpful though and we were really well looked after, with a rider that suggested someone amongst them was keenly following my work. There was a box of Ferrero Rocher and a big bottle of diet ginger beer. And there were many people on hand to help us get to and from the car and no one stopped us going through the fire doors. I am hoping to get to a point where I am considered the Egon Ronay of theatre staff criticism and every entertainment complex in the world is falling over itself to give me the best possible service in order not to get a negative write-up in my blog. And someone tweeted today to tell me that the Komedia are turning the upstairs venue that I played into a cinema - they were so stung by my criticism that they realised there was no point in trying to tempt live acts to come to the venue. That is my power. So watch it.
I wonder if this is how Elton John started. I seem to be on my way to becoming a diva.
Typically the show cured my hangover and woke me up, so I didn't get to sleep until late. Tomorrow I am doing the show twice in York so it's an early start so we can get there in time for the afternoon show and double the amount of stage time. Luckily I slept well enough tonight, and my dreams were less violent than they have been.
I feel slightly sad to think that my relationship with alcohol might be over, even though in most ways it is a brilliant thing. It signifies the loss of youth. I will become better at my job and a better person without it, but as dumb as all the stuff that alcohol has made me do might be, I rue its demise. I rue and lament it.
Just a little bit.
