"Have you ever had a facial before?" asked the therapist.
It is a good job that the podcast Richard Herrin was not on holiday with me today or I might very well have been ejected from the resort and possibly sent to prison. But I just said "No," even though I think I have had one before and I didn't say anything about whether I had ever been involved in giving facials or about offering to return the favour. So I got to stay in the health farm and didn't even get close to delivering a joke that I imagine most people who work in this job might have heard a few times before.
I was disappointed that no one ejaculated over my face at all. Then again I did have my eyes closed and some of the stuff she put on my face was a bit sticky. So maybe the disgruntled staff here take out their frustrations in a different manner than I imagined yesterday.
Or maybe it's just me that is obsessed with wanking.
Aside from this one treatment and a work out in the gym I took it very easy today. I was, perhaps unsurprisingly completely wiped out and even though I slept well last night I was almost nodding off for most of the day. But that's OK. That's what I am here for really and it's all very tranquil.
I was saddened to hear of another unexpected death, in a week when we've already lost one childhood icon. The prolific writer John Sullivan follows Sarah-Jane Smith, and it was another unpleasant shock (it would perhaps help if celebrities could make a bigger fuss when they are ill, so we're not all taken off guard). Sullivan was only one year older than Elisabeth Sladen, only 64 years old and it's astonishing to realise how much he had achieved as a young man. Citizen Smith was one of the first sit-coms that I really loved as a kid, though of course it will be for "Only Fools and Horses" that he is remembered. He was a South London boy writing about South London and choosing subjects and characters that were distinctive from other more formulaic sitcoms, but also believably real, largely, I am supposing, because he based them on real people. But that's a great lesson to other writers -to take what you know and write about it with affection but also awareness of its ridiculousness. Also though that hard work and talent will get you there. His output is astonishing.
Anyway sad news and a further unwanted reminder of how finite and flimsy our lives are and how quickly the decades pass.
Once again I am going to pay for this year's show programme (all the profits of which go to SCOPE) through a mixture of advertising and contributions from individuals. If you want to place an advert in the programme for your business or your self then get in touch and I will give you the rates (You can have a quarter page, half page or full page). If you want to get your name in the programme then please visit
my new justgiving page and make a donation of at least £12.50. The more money you give the bigger your name will appear in the programme and whoever gives the most will get some extra prizes. Everyone who donates (provided that they email me their snail mail address) will be sent a signed and limited edition version of the programme. Every year through the generosity of advertisers, donors and people at the shows we have raised tens of thousands of pounds for SCOPE. Your money is going to some amazing projects, so please donate if you can afford to do so.
And thanks to Michael Stephenson who has set up
an RSS feed for TWTTIN (twttin), so you can listen to the show which eventually spawned AIOTM (aiotm). Reading the blurb about each episode I realise I remember next to nothing about this show, but I hope you enjoy it anyway and it gives you something to occupy yourselves with until AIOTM (aiotm) returns in 3 weeks.
