What's going on? I was invited to my second celebrity event in a week and this one was a bit special - I was going to be presenting the Inspiration prize at the Q Awards. I was bamboozled as to why I had been invited at all, let alone why I had been asked to present the final award of the evening. There were proper famous stars here. Tim from the Office from the Office and Sherlock (elementary my dear Tim from the Office) got out of a cab as we arrived and then when we got to the red carpet Kevin Rowland from Dexy's was looking suave and Alice Cooper was right in front of me. I had to stand in front of banks of cameras with slightly looking confused photographers taking my photo. It's been a long time since I experienced anything like this and it never happened very often even then. My hair was still damp from the shower and my bag was over my shoulder meaning my tie was askew. But amongst rock gods I could pretend this was my special fashionable statement. Perhaps.
If I had had any doubt that none of the men aggressively shouting at me to look into their camera had no idea who I was, then I would only have had to look at
this shot online labelled Richard Perry. Ah well.
Alice Cooper was sitting at the same table as me for the ceremony and the lunch which was somewhat bizarre, but I resisted the urge to tell him that I was not worthy and to ask him about the history of Milwaukee (all my reference points are comedic). I have a feeling he wouldn't have minded if I did. In fact I rather hope that he has the Milwaukee speech memorised (it's unlikely as he appears to be reading it off of cue cards in the movie - Wayne's World if you didn't know). I was going to be presenting an award to Pulp (along with John Peel's widow Sheila Ravenscroft) and at least they were a band that I really love. In fact back in the early 90s when I wasn't really interested in music at all I only had two or three CDS- one was one that I got free from Empire (and I don't think I ever listened to) but possibly the first CD I ever bought was "A Different Class". When Stew used to turn up at Radio 1 with a record box full of obscure vinyl I would have my Pulp CD in my bag (in case the BBC didn't have their own copy). So I was really pleased to be giving the award, if still unclear as to why I was.
Awards were won by proper legends like Dionne Warwick and Kylie and the Manics and various other impressives stars were milling around. There were a few younger and more arrogant performers who showed off in a quite unpleasant manner on stage, though all of the older acts were charming and humble which is telling. Not all the younger acts were dicks - my old mate Example was funny and sweet - but many of them seemed over-excited or over-stimulated or just high on how fucking awesome they thought they were.
I had been worrying about what I would say when I got up on stage, but didn't manage to plan anything. In fact my plan had been to do as little as possible. But once up there I decided to question why I was there and suggested it was maybe because like the band that I had won I was from the 1990s. I then said, "What is it like in the future?" and pretended to be gazing through the mists of time. I got a laugh for this, which was quite an achievement as this was a tough crowd. Who knows, maybe I made Kylie Minogue laugh. Or the Sugababes. I am going to imagine that I did. I then made a joke about me being a mysterious last minute replacement for Justin Lee Collins, which didn't go down as well, but we glossed over it.
There was a big lunch and plenty of booze but I had to be un-rock n roll and be well-behaved as I was going to be heading to the Leicester Square Theatre to interview David Mitchell in the evening. I did have a couple of drinks which perhaps slightly threw me off my game, or at least made me quite tired. David, who I don't know all that well, like all the guests I've had so far, was a genuinely lovely person and he's very funny in the podcast. It goes on for fucking ages and I did really enjoy it, although I felt a bit annoyed with myself afterwards as I think I slightly overdid the self-deprecation and rudeness and was perhaps in slightly the wrong frame of mind. But the audience seemed to enjoy it still and it was a mammoth podcast and so the audience were bound to go through peaks and troughs. I do feel genuinely lucky to have chanced into this format and to have ended up with the comedians I've got as guests. It's marvellous and slightly mind-blowing to see be allowed to interact with such brilliant comic brains. Mitchell is very funny indeed in this one and copes with my oddness (partly mannered but partly real) with aplomb.
It's on the British Comedy Guide as usual (the iTunes link is also on that page).
What a surreal and funny week it's been.
