I wanted to fit a frame of Me vs Me snooker in before I had to head off to Stafford. My mother-in-law was due round at midday with some friends from Sri-Lanka who I had never met before. I only had a very limited window in which to record the 31st frame of Me-based snooker and was worried that they might arrive before I was done and their first meeting with me would be as I talked to myself in my basement whilst inexpertly playing with myself (at snooker). It might reflect very badly on me, but also make a great (if slightly surreal plot) for Terry and June (if they ever bring that back). To find out if I embarrassed myself (you know more than usual - obviously everyone in the world actually has access to this madness) then
head to the British Comedy Guide or iTunes. I think this podcast is back to its basics and in good form. I particularly enjoyed my argument with Me2 about letting his snooker do the talking. I inhabited both the character of myself and the character of a sliver of myself and was able to have what felt like a genuine disagreement. See if you agree.
What I like about this podcast is that there are little nuggets of gold scattered fairly sparsely in a big field of shit. But it's worth trudging through the mire to get to them and somehow by having gone ankle-deep in faeces it makes the good bits even more satisfying. It's a comedy treasure hunt and one in which it's easy to miss the prize due to boredom and irritation. And yet one that I think will lead to every listened who endures the pain reaching a higher level of spiritual enlightenment. It's genuinely my favourite comedy thing of all the stuff I have done. These comedians who stretch one idea over 30 minutes are lightweights. This joke has already lasted over 15 hours and I am not giving up. By the time it finishes (it never will) it will have helped humanity to evolve to a new level of consciousness. For the moment it's an intermittently amusing, generally boring disquisition on the human condition. A lot of people don't get that. But one day they will.
I felt a bit dizzy and weird on stage tonight. I was worried at a couple of points that I might go down, or even do a Tommy Cooper. I am still a little bit ill and my cough had kept me awake last night and it felt like a long time since I'd done the show (only 8 days, but the material felt unfamiliar). As occasionally happens I felt a bit like I wasn't actually inside my body, but was a slightly detached observer, listening to me doing the show but unable to offer any advice or help. The show came spilling out of my mouth, but at times I wasn't sure if I was speaking at the correct pace and once or twice questioned whether I was even speaking in English, but I think I must have been as no one complained or asked for their money back. I suppose it was a bit like Me2 running the show for a night. But he did an OK job. I perhaps hadn't mentally prepared myself. For a few seconds at the start I had forgotten which town I was in. I had to really struggle to remember and also take a punt that their local rivalry would be with Stoke (something I usually check with the crew before a show to ensure I hit the right target).
When I goaded the women in the audience saying that they envied men for having a penis because they wished they had one, a woman piped up, "We don't envy you," then she indicated her own body and said, "Because of this we can get any penis we want." It was a cheekily arrogant heckle and I liked it, but I took a chance, looked at the women slightly askance, judging her and saying, "Yeah... not totally sure about that."
It's one of those risks that could lead to disaster or hilarity - all the best jokes are a leap off a cliff that could leave to flight or smashing on the rocks below - what if she was offended by the implication. Luckily the light-hearted arrogance in her own remark was pricked by mine and she and the audience found it funny. It was an enjoyable diversion, though in my slightly unreal state of mind it threw me off a little bit as I laughed at my own outrageous cheek.
I felt a bit better in the second half and the full, though intimate room was a lot of fun to play. A lot easier than last year when I was interrupted by
a very drunk hen night (or party of Howard Jones fans), though I notice I was a bit out of body on that gig too (starting it off with the intro to Christ on a Bike by mistake). At least this year my early sell-out didn't need a group booking of 30 people who had misunderstood what was going on.
I was very glad that I didn't have to drive home this year (though note I managed to do so last time). Giles got me back to my bed (though he only took me as far as my front door - we still haven't crossed that line yet, but surely it's only a matter of time.
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