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Wednesday 30th October 2013

Warming Up #3993 (I think)

I am starting the countdown to the big 4000th entry, which my reckoning is just a week away. Will I make it? Will I stumble and fall? Will I carry on afterwards?

Yes, no, yes, if you can't bear the suspense.

I was rather charmed to see two tweets from Leonard Nimoy which read,

"@TheRealNimoy Today I was told that Spock has 3 ears. The left ear , the right ear and the final front-ear. LLAP

@TheRealNimoy Even with 3 ears how come I never heard that ear joke ? LLAP"

It seems inconceivable (illogical, even) that Nimoy has never heard that hoary old chestnut. No one has ever told him it? Surely they must have. Is he teasing us or being sarcastic? He seems mildly delighted by the revelation. It's not like it's an offensive joke. Were people still scared to tell it to him in case be exploded in fury, "How dare you joke about that? Spock has two ears and he was very sensitive about them. That is not a subject for comedy!" Nimoy, of course, went through a period where he was sick of being referred to by his character name. He wrote a book called, "I Am Not Spock" in an attempt to make people take him seriously. But later he relented and came to love being associated with the role writing a follow-up called, "I Am Spock". It's cool for him to have embraced this heritage and to have understood in what affection and regard he is held in. But maybe people were still too scared to tell him the joke in case he shouted, "I am not Spock!" at them or maybe, "I am Spock!" Or maybe "I am Bilbo Baggins", in a more obscure reference to one of the hits on his frankly wonderful LP. He was so unpredictable.

And now as an older and wiser man perhaps he appreciates his fortune at being a living legend. He and the writers of Star Trek created a character that is entrenched in the psyche of generations of human beings and will probably still be known and loved in a hundred years time. He ends every tweet LLAP, which sounds like it might be some extension of LOL. It could be a really dirty laugh or indicate something so funny that it makes you do a fart.LLLLAPPPP. But of course it stands for "Live Long and Prosper". He is so at ease with the character now that he ends every tweet he does with a fifty year old catchphrase. And I love him for that.

There's two ways to go with stuff you've done in the past, to be embarrassed about it and angry when it's brought up and refuse to play ball or to embrace it, make it your own, keep doing it, knowing that as irritating as it could be for you that it still makes people happy. Nimoy went both ways with that, but I am glad he has settled on acceptance. Because it genuinely makes me smile every time I see him write that.

On Twitter I stated that I might start using an acronym (it's an initialism, I know, but language changes and no one knows what that means) MOAS after every tweet. But there are so many I could choose. PSIAWAIWT. OIITBIHSAT. YISLMMASPLCOANBBNMISWPAWYCHABTDNTBPWATEASRR. (I really want to make that my proper catchphrase and be able to trot it out - in full - whenever asked - it's from the motorcycle clothing sketch of course) MSRMRIMRMMRRWMMIOMRMMISRMPAFTK (from memory - might not be quite right).

ABIA-IBJA-JBJAH-BAJ-BPA ZOT-APBEA-EBAAA-BAAA-BNANB-SASB-BORA-BBOORA-OBJA-JBDT-KADT-KBSOH-THBTWO-UAS-BRA-RBAAA-BAAA-BJAJ-BJAJ-BOA-OBJA-JBAAA-BEA-EBMAM-BAAA-BJA-JBJAH-BATT-TWCAT-BAATWB-TBJBS-ASBZAZ-BAAA-BEAEBAAABS-AS-BAAA-BEAEBEA-EBMAM-BJAJ-BJ-THOMOW-WBJ-WICC (though that one is tricky as it excedes the 140 character limit)

Those last two are particularly good as they acronym is genuinely a catchphrase rather than just representative of one. People tweeted me loads of alternatives, but I couldn't work out what most of them were, suggesting I have spread my catchphrases too thin (choose one or two and then stick with them forever) and that my catchphrases are mostly much too long and unwieldy. I am pleased about that.

Yeah, I sure love motorcycling. Motorcycling around. Some people like cycling on a normal bike, but not me. I say why pedal round when you can have a bike that doesn't need to be pedalled? With all the engine and stuff in it. Rrruum, rrrrummm."

You'll all be saying it in the playground tomorrow. But please make sure you get it exactly right. I've given you the acronym so it should be easy to learn. I will happily recite that catchphrase to anyone who asks me for the rest of my life and promise never to write a book called, "I am more than just the bloke in that sketch who pretends to like motorcycling when he doesn't and have done loads of stuff nearly as good as that." Or I am NOT more than just the bloke in that sketch who pretends to like motorcycling when he doesn't and HAVEN'T done loads of stuff nearly as good as that." I can promise you that neither of those books will ever be published, no matter how much I am offered to write them.

As a few of you asked, I wonder if Nimoy has heard the captain's log joke yet. Or the Kling-ons one. I hate to think he might have missed out.




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