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Wednesday 24th December 2014

4413/17332
It’s Boxing Day Eve Eve! Just two days to go until the best day of the year. I love all type of boxes and I mean ALL types (apart from boxes in their Shakespearian sense - I do not want to celebrate those).
But there’s the necessary anticlimax of Christmas Eve and Christmas Day to get through first. This time next year we will have a confused tiny whelp to celebrate with, but for now we just have our cats, who still seem to get caught up in the magic. We’re spending the holiday season at my in-laws (I hope they realise how much Boxing Day means to me) and we drove up there this afternoon. All the other chumps must have driven home earlier as the roads were clear. I am going to drive everywhere on Christmas Eve afternoon now, which will make touring quite intense. 
Christmas music played on the radio and Noddy Holder was interviewed on 6Music. They then played Slade’s Christmas hit (complete with inappropriate Slade/slayed pun) and I shouted “It’s Chriiiiisssstmmaas” over every chorus, hoping beyond hope that this would be the right occasion. But Noddy only does it right at the end. I think Slade should re release this track with him shouting “It’s Chriiiissstmaas” over every chorus (it’s what we all want) and then re release the track with none of the music and him just shouting “It’s Chriiiissstmmmaaas” over and over again.I’d buy it.
Back in the early 70s when they first released this the future had only just begun, but now the future has been going for 40 odd years and I think they should change the lyrics accordingly. People got angry that the Band Aid lyrics are no longer appropriate because they patronise Africans and are factually incorrect, but where are those righteous pedants when Slade keep on trotting out the same nonsense about time. Also I don’t think Noddy Holder’s granny is rock and rolling with the best any more. Will no one update this offensive nonsense. “Did you granny always tell you that the old ones were the best? Well now she’s dead and buried, so that has shut her up… also now this song is one of the old ones, so there is an unexpected irony within this song now that I am a grandfather myself.’ That’s just off the top of my head. But due to political correctness gone mad it is important that Slade change these lyrics. They are making fools of us all.
We eased into Christmas with another viewing of the Muppet Christmas Carol and some Harry Potter, but in this reality I didn’t stay up to watch Sliding Doors.  I am delighted I live in this reality.I feel very sorry for the Sliding Doors watching Richard Herring.

RHLSTP with Michael Legge is now up on video with a specially recorded Christmas intro (and what could be more Christmassy than Michael Legge? Nothing. He comes from Northern Ireland where they love Jesus so much that they will kill people for believing in a slightly different Jesus to them. It's what Jesus would have wanted. Maybe he went through a Sliding Doors style scenario and in one he is Catholic and the other he's Protestant, so ironically everyone is right, just some of them are in the wrong reality- and vice versa) 
itunes


And don't forget monthly subscribers, there will be a King of Edinburgh speech from 3pm on Christmas Day on your secret channel. Just pay a pound or more a month to see that (and many more cool extras).


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