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Congrats to Wordle, absolutely slamming its players today. I hope the whole thing has been leading up to this punchline. NERDY - that's what you are, you fucking prick!
I feel seen and I do not like it.
When the tour booker said they wanted to end the tour at the Royal Albert Hall, I put my foot down. NO, I shouted, WE END THIS THING IN ANDOVER. Andover is about 30 miles from Guildford where we were two days ago, but of course this being a tour, we had to do a 300 mile round trip to Norwich in between. Because we hate the environment.
I am amazed at how quickly the tour has gone and how well I've held up through it. I have been eating too much junk and not getting enough exercise, but I've been in good shape for the shows and given them all full energy. I did lie in a very hot bedroom in Andover all afternoon, playing Addams Family pinball on my iPad, but this was to conserve my remaining life force for the gig.
Sometimes at the end of a tour you're not just tired from the work, but tired of the material, but this time I wasn't internally celebrating as I delivered each routine (possibly) for the last time. I was still enjoying it and so was the audience. I have never done a show that has been this consistent.
I do know that I am more than likely to be doing another run of gigs in the Spring of 2025, so it isn't going to be the end, but even with the rather intense final month of the tour I was not punching the air with relief when I came off. It was, of course, an anti-climax or at least no different than any other gig. But aside from a couple of remote podcast records for the Edinburgh run, that is me now done with work for the summer holidays. After two long tours I am actually going to take six weeks off - aside from probably moving house in that time. Very much looking forward to spending time with my stupid family.
Bollings has been a good tour manager overall, despite trying to wind me up over mint imperials (it's a long story) and I gave him a little cupcake and a voucher and the world's only Right Bollock squeezy ball actually signed by Right Bollock. He did wrangle my bollock throughout the tour - how do you think he got the job? He gave Right Bollock a little extra appearance from the wings tonight and got a good laugh.
Good to know that I am still capable of doing this job and as much as I like all the things I do for work, stand up is the best thing. Even if it sucks to be away from the family.
In six weeks time I may relent and think it might be cool to get away from them again!
NEVER!
Another guest announcement for RHLSTP. Peter Serafinowicz will be my (only- no really) guest on 24th September. Will get to talk to him a bit longer than usual so should he a cracker.
Come along if you can.
