I met friends for lunch, as one of them is only in the country for a few days, but wondered why we don't do this much more often. Although I will see them individually occasionally these days (but only very occasionally) we only meet up once a year for our traditional Christmas meal. But there's no reason we couldn't do this at least once a month. Except for life getting in the way and whizzing by so fast that an annual meeting feels pretty regular anyway.
We are not only all still alive, but another of us has managed to procreate, making the claims that I have made over the last decade that one of us would soon die look ridiculous. I might have to top myself just to show the others that I am not a total idiot.
I then went to the club that I got to be a member of in return for doing a gig for them (but which I hardly ever go to) and sat and nursed a coffee for the afternoon as I worked on my show. As I have said before I am useless at networking and rarely go to the places or parties where people in my industry congregate, naively believing that jobs will go to those best qualified, rather than those who are qualified but also good at schmoozing. But even in my brief time here I bumped into an actor and a PR person and realised that if I was serious about doing better in my career I should probably make more effort. But I will just keep ploughing my solipsistic furrow and retain my awkwardness when meeting the influential instead. It's probably for the best. I don't belong with these people. I am not sure I belong with any people. I inhabit a strange island of my own and the ferry service is poor, but occasionally odd visitors make it along and like what they see.
It was a cool place to work though, the windows open, looking over Soho, trying to learn the To Be or Not To Be speech from Hamlet, mouthing the words to myself, ensuring that any interested executives in there would assume I was crazy and make a mental note never to employ me. Was I being like the movie-writing men who I had recently mocked for coming to a similar place to shout loudly about their idea? I don't think so. Working here in the daytime seems just about acceptable - it's what the other people there were doing. Though most of them were having high-powered meetings and not sitting surrounded by bits of paper, alone, mumbling to themselves.
I had decided to walk to tonight's gig in Spitalfields, which was about 75 minutes away on foot, but little gives me more pleasure than ambling through London, looking at the buildings and getting exercise at the same time. I was carrying my Scope bucket for the gig (the programmes were in my backpack) and within five minutes a fan of the podcast had given me a pound. On the journey two other people commented on the bucket and looked like they might donate. I wondered if I might do better work for the charity if I just wandered the streets all day, shaking my bucket. I made a pound without even trying. We're looking at at least eight pounds a day. Again I felt too awkward to close the deal on the other two men. One of whom just shouted, "Is that for Scope?" and then laughed in a way that I felt might be him laughing at me or Scope or both, so I didn't hang around to find out. The other said, incredulously, "Are you collecting for Scope?" as if my career had gone into such a nosedive that this was the only work I could get (and I wasn't even doing very well.It was 6.30pm and I only had a pound in my bucket) and I said, "Well not really just at the moment." When clearly I should have said, "Yes" and shook my one pound around in the bottom of the pail and looked at him expectantly until he was shamed into giving me some coppers.
I am simply not brazen enough in life or in work or in my social life. Maybe I should just get brazen.
The preview went well and I almost knew everything. I know most of Hamlet's words, but not my own responses. The bit is working, but it's hard to place in the show and it takes about the same length as I am currently over running. But there are other things that I could possibly cut. But I am resisting doing so in the hope that time will magically tie itself in a knot so that my 70 minute show will last only 60 minutes of your earth time. I want the show to be as strong as possible by the first Edinburgh date, but I also realised today that as long as it's flowing well that it doesn't matter if I do some of the work during the run. I have never done a show that I am not still tinkering with even by the time of the last tour date. If I can get this one right I think it has the potential to be up there with my best work. I am not sure I can get the Hamlet bit perfect with the three previews that remain (and it's not something that I think I will be able to try out on the three stand up sets I am doing over the weekend), but tonight felt that if it's in the middle of the show, rather than the end (I commented tonight after talking about my Grandma, "That feels like the end of the show, doesn't it? But I've got a bit more"), then I might be able to make it work. Can I drop "The Old Woman Who Swallowed a Fly" to accommodate it? I don't think I can. That seems to be people's favourite.
I have a week to work on my time knots, which given how bad I am at making them with string does not look hopeful.
