Warming Up

"Are you having an ice cream party?” asked the woman at the Harpenden Waitrose. To be fair to her about half of the things I was buying were lollies or ice cream tubs, but as with the last time I was shamed for my lactose tolerance in a supermarket, I was buying in bulk to keep me and my family going for a couple of weeks. I don't think two tubs of Haagen Daas, one tub of low calorie ice cream, two pack of soleros, two packs of fruit pastille lollies, some low calorie yoghurt lollies and two packs of Tangle Twisters would be much of a party. That's only about 46 lollies and maybe 12 portions of ice cream and I think at an ice cream party people would be expecting to have at least two frozen items each, so at most I am accommodating 30 people in a very short ice cream party. 

What even is an ice cream party? There's no such thing. She was clearly mocking me.

To be fair it's a better put down than “Someone likes yoghurt” in that it seems like a friendly thing to say, but is actually a withering put down. And she's right. I have been making up the chocolate that has been removed from my diet with the odd lolly or ice cream. I may well be eating too much ice cream as my diet has stalled and I've regressed a little. So my life is a bit of an ice cream party and let me tell you there is nothing but bloated sadness on the faces of the unfortunate people who are trapped in this ice cream Hell. 

Yeah, all right lady. Maybe there was a bit too much ice cream, but it wasn't all for me, like you're implying. One of the packs of Soleros was gone into the tummies of me and my kids within the hour. And the Haagen Daas was for my wife. So leave me alone.

Maybe I have to give up ice cream too.

This entry has just prompted me to eat half a tub of the (admittedly low calorie) ice cream. It was a one person ice cream party. 

I'd had a reasonably good day. I wasn't dizzy at all and I even managed to write a few pages of dialogue for one of the episodes of Relativity. Not much, but at least it felt like writing was possible and slightly enjoyable again. The RHLSTP kickstarter edged upwards to over 1000 backers and is poised delicately, but I think more likely now to be a success than a failure. Only slight disappointment is the relatively low sales for an excellent RHLSTP line up in Richmond (London) this Sunday. You don't want to see me talking to Nick Frost and Tape Face? Are you mad?