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It’s certainly felt like the start of the 12 days of Deathmas over this Christmas period, as if 2016 was going out with a daily bonus death to top off a year where it has seemingly topped off so many people of note. Rick Parfitt on Christmas Eve, George Michael on Christmas Day, Liz Smith on Boxing Day and (sob) Carrie Fisher on the 27th. So who was in for it today? And could I manage to write a jaunty version of the 12 Days of Christmas that encompassed all these departed celebrities.
On the first day of Christmas the Grim Reaper took from me… Rick Parfitt following an infection of a pre-existing shoulder injury...
No, it wasn’t right to do this. I am pretty sure that you can’t include Christmas Eve in the 12 days of Christmas. I didn’t want to offend any 12 days of Christmas purists.
So how about On the first day of Christmas, the Grim Reaper took from me, George Michael, in his sleep, quite peacefully,
No, I don’t think people are ready for it.
And anyway, as I write this blog (and unusually I am doing it on the day, rather than the day after) no famous people have died today. Apart from Knut Kiesewetter, (I bet he got teased at school) the German jazz musician, singer-songwriter and producer. No, a slip of the tongue could make this song very offensive.
But are we working towards 2016 going out with a bang and shocking us all on New Year’s Eve by taking Palin, Attenborough, Murray (Bill) and the Queen. Reading the signs available to me as a Nostradamus like prophet Elizabeth does seem to in for it. On Christmas Day we lost one of the nation’s favourite queens, on Boxing Day, the oldest member of the Royle Family and yesterday another famous (if intergalactic) member of royalty. Maybe it’s Philip that’s in for it.
Oh God, news has just come in that Debbie Reynolds has been rushed to hospital. Of course, because the 28th is nearly over in the UK doesn’t mean it’s over in the whole world. I mean it’s all just so horrible and my misjudged attempts to find some comedy in this seem somehow inappropriate. Though I do enjoy Limmy’s Twitter refusal to join in with the never ending eulogies…. And Reynolds is the mother of a princess….which adds further weight to my predictions.
Don’t worry. I am ashamed. And just trying to mask how upsetting everything is by trying to find a speck of light in the dark night sky. But I hope someone is checking on the Queen. I mean, it seems pretty unlikely that they aren’t. She’ll probably be OK… won’t she?
Either that or 2016 balances things up by taking half a dozen proper massive pricks on the 31st. I think we all know the six people I am talking about.
The only good news for us is if we survive until 1st January 2017 we will then be immortal. Good luck. We're not all going to make it.
