Warming Up

A man has been convicted of treason for attempting to kill the queen with a crossbow (though he didn’t get anywhere near his objective - though closer than he should have). 

What an idiot! She was about to die anyway! My advice to all murderers is just wait, people die in the end and you don't have to go to prison for it. Sorry to offend any murderers but you really are a load of ninnies.

I know I am probably going to get cancelled now, due to insensitivity towards murderers. You can’t say anything any more. 

Phoebe’s favourite song at the moment is Flowers by Miley Cyrus and it is a very catch and empowering piece about how sometimes breaking up with someone is better than staying with them.

Miley realises the man she has left can’t give her anything that she can’t give herself.

She sings “ I can buy myself flowers” - which is true. You don’t need someone else to buy you flowers, get them for yourself if you want them.

She continues,"Write my name in the sand”… yeah, sure, she can do that if she likes. I mean that’s a bit weird, if you’re on your own, writing your own name in the sand. If you saw Miley Cyrus writing “Miley Cyrus” in the sand then you might think she was having a breakdown or a bit up herself. Or was showing that she loved herself and that’s OK.

Then she sings, "Talk to myself for hours”. And yes, it’s also true that you don’t actually need somebody else to have a conversation. You can just talk to yourself. Again if you’re doing that as you write your name in the sand then people might be concerned. There’s the tinge of a self own to this one - is it knowing. She’s saying “I used to talk to you for hours, but now I realised I don’t need you, because I can just talk to myself” which sort of conjures up an image of her talking a lot to her boyfriend and him not getting a word in edgeways. So it’s the same if he isn’t there. A conversation is definitely better with two or more people though. Especially if it goes on for hours.

The notion that she might not have been a great conversationalist in the relationship is confirmed by the next line, "Say things you don't understand”. Which I take to mean that she said a lot of stuff that her boyfriend didn’t understand when they were together, and she can still say that stuff now he’s gone. 

"I can take myself dancing” - yes that’s back on track. It is empowering to go out alone and to carry on dancing in the face of a break up. Also she might pull someone at the disco.

It’s the final line that makes me think that this is more about the mad stuff you might do when mourning a relationship than about affirming that it’s OK to be alone.

"And I can hold my own hand”. I mean, yeah, technically you can do that. But if you are holding your own hand in order to feel the love and comfort of another person, in the way you would with a lover, then that’s a bt crazy. I don’t need you to hold my hand, because look I can hold it myself! 

Sure, but when you hold my hand you have a hand free to do other stuff, but when you’re holding your own hand then you’re just trapped in your own grip with your hands in front of you. You don’t look empowered, you look silly.

Shut up, you don’t understand anything about what I do or say.

No I don’t, cos you’re writing your name in sand and talking to yourself and holding your own hand. You’re insane. I am going to write a song about how weird it was going out with you

But like I say, Miley Cyrus might very well be making this joke herself. She’s clearly a smart, self-hand-holding, dancing cookie.

I recorded another terrific RHLSTP Book Club with Evie King today, which will go out in March and released a really interesting one with John Higgs about this book Love and Let Die.