6973/19493
The word try is doing a lot of work there and it’s noteworthy that he has never used the connection to successfully pick up a woman, because who would be into that?
"Want to have sex with the baby from Nevermind?”
"No mate, I don’t fancy that at all.”
“No, wait. Now he’s grown up I mean.”
“But you’ve put the thought of him, by which I assume you mean you, being a baby and I wouldn’t be able to shake that now. Because of your approach to this I’d be thinking “I’m having sex with the Nevermind baby” while it was happening and I am sorry, that’s not something I’m into. Good luck in your quest to find a woman who is turned on by baby dicks.”
“All I am saying is I am famous. I’m the baby from that cover.”
“So you claim, but anyone could say that. But also even if it is you, you are only famous for being a baby. So I’m going to try and help you out here, don’t ever use this as a chat up line again.”
“I thought women liked babies.”
“That’s a bit of a generalisation and even if true, I would say practically none of them like to have sex with babies. Or to have a conversation with someone who makes them think about that. I’d say it was one of my main turn offs.”
“You don’t know what you’re missing.”
“I am missing out on having sex with a man whose main achievement was being unknowingly dunked in some water and who decades later has nothing else that he can try and impress strangers with.”
“Hold on, I tried to sue Nirvana for sexual exploitation. Who would try and exploit a baby in that way to get people to like them?… oh wait, I hear it. My bad.”
“No problem.”
“Just remember this - all the people you will ever have sex were once babies. So you’re not so perfect yourself. In fact I am going to sue you for sexual exploitation.”
Apparently his actual chat up line was ‘Would you like to see my penis….again’.
Which is possibly worse than anything I’ve imagined in this blog.
