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I found the saddest bit of Hitchin Cemetery today, the bit by the chapel where they prop bits of broken grave up against the wall.
I don't know why these bits qualified to be removed and placed here - there are lots of broken gravestones in the place. In fact if the dead could rise up and sue the person who sold loads of them that stone cross version then they should. Nearly all of those have snapped or fallen over the years. The person who made them is no doubt dead too and I bet they didn't use one of their own rubbish crosses.
I understand them clearing away bits that have snapped off graves (though again, they really don't do it for most smashed edifices, there's plenty out there that are almost just a pile of broken stones), but why are there a couple of dedications amongst these remnants?
Thomas W Williams' slab looks in pretty decent nick. Did his family just not pay grave rent?
Like all of you, I still don't really believe I will die. Somehow it's not going to happen to me, or if it does it will only because our planet had crashed into the sun in 8 billion years time. And even then, maybe not.
Death is so inevitable and constant that it's amazing to me that it ever surprises us, but it nearly always does. "I can't believe they're gone." Did you not realise that was a possibility and eventually an inevitability? "But they were so young! only 58." Sure, that is slightly more surprising, but not beyond human imagination.
I wondered as I left the graveyard today if it'd be better if we were surprised every time that we saw someone and they were still alive. It's more realistic and also a great way to celebrate people while they are still here. "Oh my God. You're not dead! Amazing." We could hold each other and anchor ourselves in the fact that in this moment we are both living and full of joy that the other one hasn't stopped breathing in the night and isn't buried beneath the cold Hitchin soil with their grave marker leaning against a building because they've forgotten where they put you.
Not just other people. If you wake up and find yourself not dead you should be giving a little cheer, rather than moaning about the fact that it's 6.15am and you have to go to work.
One day you'll wake up to find you haven't woken up and all that is left is infinite darkness that you're not even in a position to witness.
Come on, let's switch it. Not be surprised by death - expect it at every second- and then be delighted that the people we love and ourselves are still going.
Of course the pricks you hate might still be going too, but you at least know that one day they won't be. And if they outlive you at least you'll get to a point where their existence really doesn't matter any more.
I am amazed you're still alive to read these words, but I am glad you are.
The nice thing about words is that they can hang around and sometimes get read by people who weren't here when they were written.
