7528/20457
A full on day as I set off early to Yorkshire so I could see York City take on Middlesbrough before heading to Leeds for my late afternoon work in progress gig.
It was a lot of driving. I left a sarcastic amount of time for the journey up setting off four and a quarter hours before the time I was due to be there, for a journey that should take just over three. But I was still ten minutes late. But my friend was later, so it didn't matter. We got into the match having missed the first two minutes.
I had a couple of near misses in car parks when I stopped for comfort breaks. The first time, as I was leaving, I checked my mirrors and looked for approaching vehicles and all was clear. But as I backed out I was aggressively beeped by a Jaguar that was coming out of the space behind me. It was like it had materialised from nowhere.
At my next stop I got a tweet saying that someone had witnessed this, the shittest game of chicken he'd ever seen. I was concerned that I had missed a big car and commented that it was as if it had appeared from nowhere. He tweeted back to say the other car was at fault. It was attempting to cut through from the other lane through that space, so it really had basically teleported in and (I think) would have been to blame had a collision happened. Also the elderly woman driving should have seen me given she was going forwards.
As I left my parking place at this second stop I looked intently behind me to check no one was going to surprise me. But I didn't properly look for cars approaching and nearly pulled out into another vehicle. This one would have been my fault. I felt like I was begin Final Destinationed!
Anyway, the match was fun. It was at York's new stadium - the last time I'd seem them at the piss smelling but historic Bootham Crescent the players had been sluggish and a couple of them a bit chubby and we'd hoofed our way to a lucky win, but our latest crop of players looked young and fit and passed the ball impressively. It was hard to tell which was the Championship team and which was in the fifth tier. It gave us hope that we might be heading upwards this season, but supporting this team is all about crushed hope.
The sun was shining as we arrived, but dark clouds started looming and there was thunder and you could actually see the rain pouring out of the dark clouds even though they were a mile away. Suddenly it hit the ground, pelting down like someone had poured a huge bucket of water out of the sky, drenching us and stopping the match. People tried to take cover at the back of the stands or back through into the entrance hall.
I was soaking and thought it wasn't going to be a great day being in damp jeans and also that there was a chance the game would be abandonned. But it started up again within ten minutes and the rain stopped and the sun came out and it got so hot that I was dried out and a bit too warm at the end of the match.
There were no goals but it was a fun afternoon and my favourite bit was when York substituted nine players at the same time during the second half.
The match having been delayed the timings to get to Leeds were a bit tight, especially given how long it was taking me to get out of the car park, but I made it in time and time for a burger before the gig. It's been a while since I played the Wardrobe, but it was good to be back. It was sold out and the audience were ace. And I was pretty good too. It didn't feel like a Work in Progress for most of the time. There are a few rough corners to knock off and I forgot a few bits, but I didn't really use notes at all. It's very encouraging. It's a funny show with moving bits and some positive conclusions and it might help to save a couple of lives. So I think it's worth doing, even if you've heard a lot about my ball already.
Right Bollock appeared this time and though he slightly ran out of steam, he wasn't quite as shy as usual and there was some funny adlibs from the cancerous testicle.
Then after doing some signing and photos I was back on the road for what felt like a long three and a half hour drive home. I heard an episode of ITMA and it was almost entirely unintelligible as a comedy, but having been recorded just days after VE day it was a valuable historical document . Though I couldn't stop thinking about how everyone involved is now almost certainly dead. The fingers and mouths that played the music, the audience laughing along at the confusing jokes. It's my overriding thought when listening to old stuff on 4 Extra, but you know, all those dead people would be amazed to think that people woudl still be listening (if not enjoying it) in 2023. If anyone is listening to Lionel Nimrod in 2068 then I'll be well made up. But I'll be 101 then and probably listening too.
