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I took the dog out for its evening walk. We'd had a nice day in the house with family friends (we hadn't seen them since just before lockdown and in that time their eldest boy has transformed from a child into a man - I am not sure I would have recognised him if he wasn't with his family), with a Sunday roast, though I'd done the lunchtime dog walk and though it had been cold and muddy, the weather had been OK.
I was surprised when I opened the door, just before 6pm that it was raining, just because I hadn't really looked out of the window. It shouldn't have been that bit a surprise after the weekend of weather we've had, with an average of a storm and a half a day. Luckily for the world I was recording my every movement, as I'd decided to do a stone clearing podcast tonight. It's amazing how much incident I manage to get into given the banal nature of this educational project.
Once I was on the field the dark of night was setting in and the rain got a bit heavier. My face was being cut by tiny slivers of ice as the rain turned to sleet or light hail. The rain became so heavy that water filled and stung my eyes. I couldn't really see where I was going. And as I crossed the field the Heavens opened even more and I was under aerial bombardment. My trousers were soaked through to the skin, I was being buffeted by the elements and I wasn't sure if I was going to make it home. I played up to the awfulness of the situation, crying out for my mummy (or was it all for real? only you can decide) and wondered if this recording might be used for evidence (of my cowardice) if they found my frozen body in the morning. It wasn't quite as extreme as the time (sadly unrecorded) where I got pelted with hail stones, whilst watching lightning hitting the ground in front of me, getting increasingly closer and coming in a straight line for me. But it was close.
I got home alive, but the path down past our house had turned into a stream and once inside I left a puddle behind me. Luckily we had a fire going and I dried myself off. My eyes were red and my clothes were soaked through. It was like I had spent a week with Bear Grylls.
