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Tuesday 10th May 2022


I got the copy edit of my book back today, plus a few legal queries (really just checking permissions for using certain quoted sections). Apparently the lawyer really enjoyed the book and got through it much quicker than usual. It might be the only review I get, but it's enough for me.
This is a deep dig to check grammar and writing style are all sound and that everything makes sense. The copy editor has done a bang up job, though as always the occasional joke gets chewed up in the process. It's OK. I am allowed to keep things if I want to. But I enjoyed a little nod to Pulp Fiction where I talked about being two "little Fonzies" becoming two mini-Fonzies (because I'd already used little earlier in the sentence). Mini-Fonzies might be funnier.
Also their final note is arguing with my assertion that (spoilers) ghosts don’t have bumholes. I bet they've never had to contend with anything like that before. I love it when my stupid stuff collides with someone with a proper job. Ghosts don’t have bumholes either.
It's a scary part of the process because once I send this back then I am basically letting this go. It will be done (unless I spot any little mistakes when doing the audio book) and so even though I've been through everything, I am reluctant to return my copy, for fear I've missed some huge fuck up or boring bit. This is the last chance to shoot for perfection and prevent me opening up the first copy I receive to notice a glaring error.
On the other hand my work (audio book aside) is basically done. I think it's good. So does the lawyer. But when have you ever trusted a lawyer?

It’s a much more relaxed month work wise of course. I am managing to do some exercise most days and listening to audio books (which is technically work as I am trying to find potential guests of the RHLSTP book club). I did a long dog walk this morning and then a 4km run (it was meant to be 6km but I walked the last bit), whilst listening to a memoir about what it’s like growing up with an alcoholic father. A lot of the books I have read this year have stories of personal sadness, often in childhood and I am left feeling guilty that my own family were basically pretty decent (unless I am repressing something - let’s hope so if I want to get another book deal). Even my book about getting cancer is full of jokes and positivity. 
I wondered if my kids might one day write books about me and what they would say if they did. I am doing all I can to raise them well, but most parents are and some spectacularly fail. Parents are just people it turns out and a lot of people are fuck ups. My kids seem to have no respect for me from the start, which will probably prevent them from being disillusioned later. 

Snooker tonight and the arena was dedicated to the much missed Jesus Marinas - the Jesus of the sea. Did he swim on the land? I decided that there must also be an Air Jesus so I think that Jesus Marinas swims in the air and Air Jesus flies on the land and Land Jesus walks on the water. Anyway it was a crucial frame in the contest in which ironically enough I almost lose a ball. It will be on YouTube and up as an audio podcast if you missed it (viewing figures were impressively low tonight, so you probably did). Video here 

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Buy my new book/ebook/audiobook "Would You Rather?" (get stickers and a signed bookplate from gfs. Also available as a very different audiobook with the brilliant Stevie Martin
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