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Incapable of sleeping past 6.30am even when I am kid free, but at least Catie had a bit of a lie in.
She had to get back for the kids and I had to travel to Liverpool as I am recording an episode of "You're Dead To Me" near there tomorrow. But we had time for lunch and walked round the corner to the posho Ivy Asia St Pauls. It was really lovely and my meal of sashimi and broccoli scored well on the Zoe app (though I blew it a little bit by having some of Catie's tempura prawns and chicken satay).
I went to the loo before we left and nearly jumped out of my skin to see a samurai warrior in full garb having a slash at the urinal. He was looking around at me with fury in his eye, as if I had disturbed him in a private moment, which I suppose I had. After a second I surmised that this might be a waxwork figure, but I wasn't going to take the chance by staring at him, so ducked into a stall and did my wee there. He was still looking round when I came out and I risked taking a photo, still not 100% sure that he was inanimate.
What kind of place is Ian Ivy-Asia running here? Why is a respectable restaurant attempting to scare its clientele in such a way? People might soil themselves with fear. Even more likely as anyone in here already needs to go. Apparently this warrior is waiting in the bogs at all the branches of this restaurant. And I am still not entirely convinced it's not a real man being a living statue. I was still expecting him to come to life to shock me further and then Jeremy Beadle would come in as a bumbling toilet attendant in a false beard and surprise me further - he would really have gone to town on this too - faking his own death many years ago and staying in hiding so he could really pull this thing off. The prank, not the Samurai's willy.
I didn't dare look to see if the model had his cock out, just in case it was part of a prank. I just took off my soiled underwear and went back into the restaurant.
Then a train ride to Liverpool, finishing off Adrian Edmondson's truly remarkable autobiography, which made me tear up as he did an impression of Rik giving his People's Poet speech. I don't think I have processed Rik Mayall's death properly. I also cried when I was doing a talking head show about the Young Ones. Adrian's book is sad and vulnerable and gives real insight into this remarkable man. I hope I can get him on RHLSTP at some point. He's come close a couple of times.
A night in Liverpool on my own, but once at the hotel at 5.15pm I didn't leave my room, watched a bit of the fascinating David Beckham documentary and had a relatively early night. Did I sleep beyond 6am. Tune in tomorrow to find out. Of course not.
